Emotional intelligence and the leadership related to it is all about feelings. It’s about knowing how you are feeling, understanding why and knowing how to express those feelings. It is crucially about when to express and when to contain. This may appear to be a simple enough statement with enough truth in it to make sense. The current situation however, for a lot of leaders is a different story. In our experience the majority of the leaders we work with all of whom are reasonable emotionally intelligent, mistake containing feelings for suppressing them. Feelings, whatever they are, need expressing. The moment they are experienced may not be the healthy time to express but they need expressing at some point. If not expressed then feelings held in will fester and either cause unhelpful emotional damage or be let out inappropriately and towards the wrong people. An emotionally intelligent leader needs first to be aware of their own feelings and to be skilled at expressing their feelings in a healthy way. Once at this stage you can truly use your empathy skills and really connect with and lead others emotionally.